Tuesday, June 14, 2011

The making of Shitan




(Recieved this email forward, thought it was cheeky)


Struggling Indie filmmaker:
Blah blah blah No Smoking Blah blah blah Dev.D Blah blah blah Guru Dutt Blah blah blah Kurosawa Blah blah blah Tarantino Blah blah blah Chan-wook Park Blah blah blah Kafka Blah blah blah Kieslowski Blah blah blah…

Wannabe experimental rich film producer:
Blah blah blah Dabangg blah blah Devdas Blah blah blah Manmohan Desai Blah blah blah Karan Johar Blah blah blah Sajid Khan Blah blah blah Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jaayenge blah blah blah YRF Blah blah blah Kuchh Kuchh Hota Hai Blah blah blah item song Blah blah blah… Uday Chopra Blah blah blah bikini scene...

Struggling Indie filmmaker:
Blah blah blah Noir genre Blah blah blah Mise-en-scène Blah blah blah

Wannabe experimental rich film producer:
Fuck off!


Cut to


Drunk struggling Indie filmmaker:
Blah blah blah No Smoking Blah blah blah Dev.D Blah blah blah Guru Dutt Blah blah blah Kurosawa Blah blah blah Tarantino Blah blah blah Chan-wook Park Blah blah blah Kafka Blah blah blah Kieslowski… Bukowski… Godard… Fellini… ORGASM! ORGASM! ORGASM!

Drunken established Indie filmmaker:
Blah blah blah No Smoking Blah blah blah Dev.D Blah blah blah Guru Dutt Blah blah blah Kurosawa Blah blah blah Tarantino Blah blah blah Chan-wook Park Blah blah blah Kafka Blah blah blah Kieslowski… Bukowski… Godard… Fellini… ORGASM! ORGASM! ORGASM!

(Calls production house and instructs to invest in film)


Drunken struggling Indie filmmaker:
It is a story about today’s youth and how they are told to lead their miserable lives and how only movies are made about rich kids who go bowling or jet skiing… Blah blah blah and we can have witty dialogues and songs contradictory to situation and some jabs at the system, racial jokes, swearwords, corrupt cops ORGASM! ORGASM! ORGASM!


Drunk established Indie filmmaker:
Hallelujah!!! Blah blah blah wow orgasm! how smokin' cool! As long as you cast…


(Rolls a joint)