Like all those who spend most of the waking hours on the internet, I knew of AIB since they had started doing podcasts. I didn't particularly like them, so I don't qualify as a fan. Thanks to the BIG names involved, I also knew of the AIB Roast well in advance. I didn't whore myself out to buy the expensive ticket, despite the fact that the proceeds would go to charity.
As they say, charity begins at home. In my case it's usually at some dingy bar in the vicinity.
For me it was just another day, when the AIB Knockout happened amidst a HUGE audience, and it didn't bother my piddly existence one bit. I am sure nobody at the 'roast' missed my absence as well. A few weeks passed by, and I saw the teaser / trailer of the AIB Knockout on the official channel. I swear it had grabbed me by my balls. I hadn't seen anything like this, that too at this BIG a scale.
Like every other creative keeda, I was rubbing my hands in wicked glee. WHAT DID I JUST WATCH? Confession: I have ugly, dark and wicked corners in my khopdi ki jhopdi, but this was something else. For once I regretted not paying people to make me laugh. May be I should have attended the AIB Knockout after all. From whatever little they had shown in the trailer, I thought these guys have collectively created history. HAWAAI FIRING!
A few more weeks later the edited version of the AIB Knockout was put out. I was eagerly looking forward to it. Everyone was talking about it; even the Lokhandwala dudes who usually discuss their workout regimes and protein intake were discussing the show in hushed tones. The roast started with a BANG, and I was laughing like a dervish possessed. 30 minutes into it, and I was getting bored. May be it was my mid-life-crisis, or the jokes were getting too repetitive for my liking.
Same old, same old... There were flashes of genius, but they remained just that - flashes of genius. I felt relieved that I didn't pay to watch that stuff. My wallet jumped out of my drawer and hugged me tightly. The 10 rupees' notes in it started doing ghaati dance all over my study table. BUT that's it. I didn't take to the streets screaming that I was hurt and left cheated. Hell, how could I be cheated when I didn't even pay for it. I knew what was coming my way, and I watched it. END OF STORY.
What prompted me to write this piece is the shit I have been seeing floating around ever since some random fungi decided to express their displeasure over the AIB Knockout on National TV. These jokers have saddened me no end. Every time these regressive fossils open their foul mouths, our country goes back a few decades. I wish we could just shut these idiots up. If anybody needs to be probed or punished, it has to be these peddlers of the pseudo 'sanskriti and sabhyata'.
As far as the AIB Knockout is concerned - Guys, well tried with the roast this time, but expecting much more next time - that is, if you aren't sentenced for life or some such.
What a joke...
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